Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Quote Of The Day: No Fat Chicks

Est-ce que tu as un plan ? Je me suis perdu dans tes yeux.

"You know what happens is a pretty girl walks down the aisle and you say, 'Boy, I'd like to take her to the prom.' But there's also one who's tried and true and you know is going to be there."
--Chuck Neinas, Interim Big XII Conference Commissioner 

Of course, he is speaking about Mizzou checkin' out that hotty the Southeastern Conference, with her strawberry blonde hair, and huge rack, and... uh, never mind.

This all would imply the Big XII is an ugly but loyal chick.  So, take that how you will.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

How To Throw A Bitchin' Celebration


Prior to Saturday's Iowa-Iowa State in-state rivalry game, much ado was made about the new trophy depicting a farmer presenting a family with corn, because, you see, Iowa has corn.

So, since that was stupid and had nothing to do with football, or was not retro or vintage enough to be considered charming or cute, the Iowa Corn Association (?) scraped it and created an interim award.  And after the game on Saturday, they will need to find of a replacement again soon.

Iowa State, having only won the game twice in eight tries since 2003, won the game and threw an awesome party on the sidelines.  Now, I'm not a huge proponent of students rushing the field after marginal victories against decent rivals whom they have been competitive against in recent memory (i.e. Arizona State after beating Mizzou on Friday), but if a mob rushes the field and wrecks shit, then by all means enjoy yourself.  Click here to see the new interim trophy ripped in pieces and lost to history at the 1:50 mark (please disregard the stupid questioning by usually tactful Jim Knox.  That wins a nomination for the Lisa Salters most douche question award).

(Manipulated headline photo via)

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

This Crappy Commercial: April 2011-September 2011

"We are...an overused marketing gimmick!"
After airing over fifty billion times on multiple networks, this commercial needs to die now.  This white guy dancing was never funny, AT&T, and it has effectively made me hate advances in cellular phone technology.

Watch it here, because you have never seen it before...:

Via YouTube commenter sapher2020, something I had not thought about before but makes absolutely no sense.

"If the flash mob was moved to 12:30 then what are those other assholes doing there a half an hour early? Were they just planning on standing there for 30 minutes the whole time in their trench coats"

Yeah, no shit.  Assholes.  Flash mobs suck because of this...and punk kids.

(/scowls and shakes fist from porch)
 

Monday, August 29, 2011

So, A Hurricane Happened?



I'm from the Midwest, so these are the images that I see.  It looks like a lot of rain.

Also, it looks dangerous-ish.

Gross.

Pic via
Video 1 via
Video 2 via

Friday, August 26, 2011

Dear EA Sports; This Looks Dumb

If you have ever played an EA Sports created video game (i.e. Madden, NCAA Football, NHL Series, etc.) then you know that all too often EA will add certain elements to a game that completely overlook and take the place of simple gameplay adjustments that desperately need to be done to create a more 'realistic' experience for sedentary nerds like me.  In the football games it's usually the tackling, passing, catching animations, in the NHL games it's typically the hitting, poking, and invisible sticks when it comes to blocking pucks (defensive aspects), and the list goes on and on.




Thursday, August 25, 2011

The Great Gatsby Arrives in Australia...

Today brought me a few The Great Gatsby links to share via this wonderful Facebook group that you simply must join.

Courtesy of Lainey Gossip, this is what the car will look like in the new Gatsby film.  That's a pass, it looks legit, like a rich guy would own it.  It also looks like it could be used for vehicular manslaughter...
Car comparisons after the jump.

This link explains the issue I have with the whole Australian aspect of the film better than I could.  So, thank you for that.

This is linked within the above story, for those who didn't click on the above story or the link within the story.  This recently razed house is apparently rumored to be what Fitzgerald based Daisy's East Egg house off of, which begs the question, "WHY DID THEY TEAR IT DOWN????"  If you are a history, art,  architecture, or literary buff, let me just warn you that those pictures of it coming down are really, really sad.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

"This Just Proves to Me How Much We Just Do Not Know About How Our Earth Moves and Changes"

That is a quote from some guy from the show Good Morning America interviewed about his reaction to the colossal, earth-shattering (ha), mega earthquake that ripped apart the East Coast and sent the states of Virginia, Maryland, North Carolina, and for some reason Maine plunging into the Atlantic Oce...wait, oh that didn't happen.  Well, the quote is real, as he goes on to say that 'scientists' and their damn SCIENCE can't predict something like this, and so on and so forth... So, carry on.

The East Coast, all of California is ignoring you right now and calling you wusses.  California!