Friday, October 18, 2013

Flubber's College Pigskin Prime Cuts of the Week 2013: Week 8

Last week's recap:
Mizzou to cover 7 points: YEP
Under 64 points:  NOPE
Final score: Missouri 41 Georgia 26

Still, picked an upset correctly!!!
This week's matchup:

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Flubber's College Pigskin Prime Cuts of the Week 2013: Week 7

Okay, so, Vegas happened.  Specifically, Caesar's Palace's beautiful sports book.  There were a ton of Ohio State fans – i.e. people who bet on Ohio State – watching the Ohio State-Wisconsin game.  Those odds looked terrible, and you never want to bet against Ohio State in Big Ten conference games now that Urban Meyer is around, so that game was off the table.  Instead, I took the odds on Mizzou to beat the halftime spread of 10.5 against Arkansas State.  Mizzou was up 14-12 at half, and it was all fun and games until Ark State went up 16-14 three minutes into the second half.  So, to sum up, NEVER GAMBLE.

Here's a recap of the past couple weeks.

Stanford beats 6.5 against Arizona State:  YEP
Under 52.5:  NOPE
Final score: Stanford 42 Arizona State 28

Mizzou to beat 10.5 at half against Arkansas State:  YEP (eventually)
Final score:  Missouri 41 Arkansas State 19

Just give me a minute.

This week's matchup:

Friday, September 20, 2013

Flubber's College Pigskin Prime Cuts of the Week 2013: Week 4

Last week's recap:

Game 1:
Iowa State covers two points vs Iowa: NOPE
Under 48 1/2 points:  YEP (barely!)
Final score:  Iowa 27 Iowa State 21

Game 2:
Oregon spreads Tennessee by 28:  YEP
Over 72 1/2 points:  YEP (barely again!)
Final score:  Oregon 59 Tennessee 14

Holy crap, beat the over/under by 1/2 a point in each game.  I've got this shit figured out.  All aboard, next stop Richville.  Population: Me.

This week's matchup:

Friday, September 13, 2013

Flubber's College Pigskin Prime Cuts of the Week 2013: Week 3

Last week's recap:

Game 1 and only: 
Southern Miss to cover 28 points vs Nebraska: NOPE
Under 58 1/2 points:  NOPE
Final score: 56-13 Nebraska


This week's matchup:

Saturday, September 7, 2013

Flubber's College Pigskin Prime Cuts of the Week 2013: Week 2

Last week's recap:
Game 1: North Carolina @ South Carolina
North Carolina to cover 11 1/2 points: NOPE
Under 56 1/2 points: YEP
Final score: 27-10 South Carolina

Game 2: LA Tech @ NC State
LA Tech to cover 13 1/2: NOPE
Over 62 1/2 points: NOPE
Final score: 40-14 NC State

Damn Bryn Renner.  All I needed was a garbage touchdown and his aimless scrambling left me five yards short.  JUST LIKE A MAN!!!

This week's matchup are a lot of shitty games this week.  Should be easy to take money, right!!!

Southern Mississippi Golden Eagles vs Nebraska Cornhuskers
Colorful matchup!

When:  5:00 PM CT

Where:  Memorial Stadium, Lincoln, NE

History:  Nebraska is 3-1 all time (meaning the last 15 years).  It's 1/10 of the Michigan-Notre Dame rivalry!  Tradition!

Significance:  Southern Miss lost to Texas State last week despite quarterback Allan Bridgford throwing for 377 yards.  Nebraska beat Wyoming last week despite Cowboys quarterback Brett Smith throwing for 383 yards and 4 TDs.  So, if A=B and B=C, then A=C, right?  RIGHT?

Essentially, this is a game that will either prove or disprove humanity's perception of mathematics.  We shall call it the MATH BOWL!!!

Consensus Vegas Line (as of 6/7, noon CT):  Nebraska by 28.  Southern Miss covers, only because Nebraska misses an extra point.  Nebraska 41, Southern Miss 14.  The O/U is 58 1/2, so, no, that won't happen.  This is Nebraska and Southern Miss.  C'mon.

Question to Ponder:  Why am I watching this?

What Else:  Southern Mississippi's only win in this series was when Bill Callahan was the coach of the Cornhuskers.  So that's hilarious and obvious.

No bonus game this week because Flubber is running low on funds.  You can send money to the refugee camp where he will soon be living.

Monday, August 26, 2013

Flubber's College Pigskin Prime Cuts of the Week 2013: Week 1

Introducing Flubber's College Football picks, where we here at Double Tapered will pick one game of significance and one bonus game to watch during every week of the NCAA* College Football season.

The game of significance will typically feature a game Flubber deems as a possible upset, or has a high probability of a spread getting covered.  This is done using the foremost research in the various fields of science and you should not concern yourself with this matter any further.

Before we get started, play this video.  PLAY IT!

Week One's Game Of Irrational Importance

The first game of the year•, y'all!  Yay, football makes it's glorious return!  All bad in the world will surely die away as football fans crack open their meat smokers and cases of PBR in what can only be described as the most reassuringly pleasant orgy of sound in the entire world.  America exhales.

When: Thursday 8/29 at 5pm CT

Where: Columbia, SC

History: North Carolina leads the series 34-17-4.  South Carolina won the last matchup in 2007 21-15 in North Carolina.

Significance:  Battle of Charleston, SC, 1780.  The British launch a "southern strategy" meant to arouse Loyalist sentiment in the South in hopes of laying the groundwork for a Northern invasion to recapture the colonies.  This also happens during a time of instability within General George Washington's Continental Army in the North, and the Southern commander Benjamin Lincoln was left alone and largely responsible for the troops in the South.  Lincoln feels the brunt of the British attack when they first take Savannah, GA in 1779, chasing Lincoln to Charleston.  It was here he was held under siege in the command of a depleted Patriot militia.  He lobbied the South Carolina legislature and George Washington for reinforcements, but none were offered.  Lincoln was forced to surrender the town, giving the British a crucial port city to launch their Southern invasion.

Pick: Benjamin Lincoln and South Carolina take out their anger of Washington and the North's apathy on North Carolina; Southern politics are never the same.

Consensus Vegas Line^ (as of 8/26):  SoCar -11 1/2.  Oooo AIN' SHE A SEXY UPSET PICK!  You like that pick, don't you?  You would.  Always finding every reason to shit all over the SEC.  I'm sure you're all ready to explain how this is the year the SEC falls from grace.  That TCU dismantles LSU, that Murray State embarrasses Mizzou, that Vandy's James Franklin has been full of shit this whole time, that an ACC school hangs with their bigger, stronger, richer, larger, meatier, state schoolier, dare I say SEXIER SEC brethren?  No no no, this can't be.  You may say "but but the history," to which I declare "Scoff on your history!  And scoff on you!  College football lives and breathes on SEC schools and the rest of the country is just filler material in bad meatloaf.  If they would rather die they had better do it, and decrease the excess population!  I DON'T REMEMBER ASKING YOU A GODDAMN THING."

No, wait.  Hold up, you're right.  North Carolina covers.

The point over/under is 56 1/2 according the the consensus line.  These teams historically have not scored higher than 53 points since a 54 point output in 1974 (11 meetings ago), and you have to remember that football was much tougher and grittier back then.  Go with the under.  South Carolina 28-North Carolina 17.

Question to Ponder:  Who decided putting black in the Tar Heels jersey was a good idea?  It's 2013, my television is black; c'mon let's have some color.

What Else:  South Carolina's Jadeveon Clowney did this once:
Can I change my pick...?

One Bonus Game after the jump!

Saturday, June 30, 2012

The Official Great Gatsby Trailer (With 100% Too Much Tobey Maguire)

It's definitely...uh...colorful.  And the random action scenes, ohhh the ACTION, people.  The action.  Ac-tion.  No wonder this thing is in 3D.

Weren't the 1920s in black and white?